We’re on Standby, Appreciating This Moment, & Reflecting on Relationships forged over many years….
- Kimberly OLeary
- 3 days ago
- 8 min read
Updated: 2 minutes ago
It's been a while since I've blogged on this site. After Osaka, we were briefly in Kuala Lumpur to resupply medications. We visited a couple of friends, but didn't go out much because we both ended up with bad colds.
Since late October, 2025, we've been back in the U.S., mostly in Michigan. We’ve not made a secret of the fact that we usually prefer to travel and reside outside of the U.S.A. We wrote about that here a couple of years ago. And, after almost four years of full-time travel, we still yearn for the adventure, climate, and lifestyle of other ports. On the days where the thermostat doesn't reach 20F (-7C), I am reminded that, all things being equal, I’d prefer not to spend winters in a cold climate any more. Weather in Michigan in winter is variable - two weeks ago, it was a balmy 52F (11C) and when we walked to the grocery it felt refreshing and delightful. How quickly we adapt! But today, it's back to 19F (-7C). We lived in the U.S. most of our lives, and in Michigan for over 20 years. There were, and are, many things we love about it. We pursued fulfilling careers here, raised a family, and made a lot of friends. We find ourselves back in Michigan for 4-plus months, once more during the coldest part of the year. So we’ve been trying to focus on the things we really love about being here.
What we love about being back in Michigan (and in the U.S.)
Spending time with our kids.
By far the best thing about being here is the time we get to spend with Kate, Ben, Ziggy & their new cat, Stella. Yes, there is Zoom, and e-mail, and phones, and texts, and Facebook, but nothing beats in person contact for real conversation, laughter, love and fun. A virtual hug is just not the same as a real one. It feels luxurious to drop by each others' homes, enjoy meals together, and visit friends as a group. Simply watching a movie and laughing together at the exploits of Benoit Blanc is a treat.
We even moved tiny furniture with our pinkies playing this game Kate & Ben bought, and played Hanafuda, the Japanese card game Paul's parents taught him when he was a kid.
We've spent a delayed birthday celebration, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve together, cooking our favorite holiday meals and treats. We treasure these moments. And, during our brief stop in San Francisco on the way back from K.L., we also visited our son, James, and daughter-in-law, Maggie (who we enjoyed seeing in Osaka at the end of August).
Seeing close, local friends who are like family.
After 20 years, we have a lot of close friends in the Lansing area. Admittedly, sometimes it feels hectic to see everyone when we’re back, but there is not a single person we regret spending time with. Ever. We do have some loved ones who visit us abroad (thank you for that) but to see most of our loved ones, we have to come back. We saw more friends than are in the photos - part of being back is that sometimes, I rest my camera and just visit. So - you know who you are - and we love you!
Being close enough to make trips to see family & friends who live outside of Michigan, and reconnecting after many years.
This has been a season for reconnecting with old friends. At the end of October, Paul and I flew to Evansville, Indiana, where we attended my 50th High School reunion. While in major denial about being old enough to have a 50th reunion, when I saw my friends it was like we had just seen each other last week! It is nice to know that the fantastic, warm, witty friends I spent time with in high school are still fantastic, warm, and witty! And lookin' pretty good, the lot of us, if I say so myself. Here are photos from elementary school, high school, a few years after high school graduation, and our 50th reunion.
We also visited old friends in Boston and Cleveland, Ohio. On an East Coast road trip (more on that later), we visited a college friend who we had not seen in 41 years. Rebecca - whose husband, Terry, we met in Osaka last August - is a dear friend with whom we were thrilled to reconnect. We also met their daughter, Malka. We especially enjoyed making music (a rounds night with Rebecca, enjoying Terry & Malka's Scottish music). Lots of great conversation, laughter, and love. After Boston, we drove to Cleveland to see our dear friends Sue & Randy. Sue was also a college friend, and friends with Rebecca as well. Wonderful visit there, too!
Kate & I made a third trip to Louisville, Kentucky, to see family - my Aunt, Uncle, and cousins. We were so busy visiting, I forgot to take photos of any of the people! But here are some pictures of the drive there and back. Kate & I had a fun time on our road trip.
Finally, I flew to Florida this week to see two sets of people. First, to celebrate my cousins' wedding anniversary. Martin is my mother's first cousin, Charlene's, only son. We are close in age and share a love of history and travel. He and his husband, Steven, are architects and live in Miami Beach. They had several wonderful events. My cousin, Rick, flew in from Louisville (Rick is my Aunt Donna's son) and we stayed in the same aparthotel on Miami Beach. The anniversary events were fantastic, and it was great both to catch up with all of my cousins and to meet new people. Rick & I also explored Miami Beach and the Everglades National Park (more on that later).
Second, I flew to Orlando to see my good friend and mentor, Vernellia Randall. Vernellia inspires me in ways that I wrote about here. She is a dear friend. She lives with her son, Tshaka, and her grandsons. It had been too long since I had seen her in person, and we enjoyed each other's company immensely. I also enjoyed catching up with her sons.
Opportunities to visit New York City & Florida
In adddition to catching up with friends and family, we got a chance to enjoy two great U.S. places - New York and Florida. The road trip to New York and back (via Boston and Cleveland) was beautiful, and the open stretches of land and trees were soothing.
We were in New York in early December, and enjoyed walking all over Manhattan. We had to be there to have interviews for our Portugal resident visas, which seemed to go very smoothly. While there, we walked and walked all over. We saw art at MOMA and the Guggenheim, ate incredible food at Katz Deli (I'll have what she's having!), had Iberian meals in the Portuguese neighborhood of Newark where we were staying, and soaked up Christmas decor. It was great.
In Florida, I took in the Art Deco of Miami Beach, swam in the ocean (my cousin Rick went jet-skiing), had great food, watched the sun set, and visited the Everglades National Park where we saw lots of alligators and birds. We rented a BMW convertible so Rick could have fun with the drive to the Everglades.
American breakfast.
OK, maybe not as meaningful as enriching our important relationships, but nobody does breakfast quite like America, and where else can Paul get his favorite two eggs sunny side up, home fries, sourdough toast with butter and sausage links? He just can’t find the perfect breakfast overseas. Sausage is really different in other parts of the world, and a familiar maple-flavored breakfast sausage is comfort food. Bagels & cream cheese are divine. Not just bread with a hole, but that familiar texture and flavor. Cream cheese that spreads just so. Super crispy bacon is my favorite. Rugelach & croissants in New York. Bran flakes (in much of the world, breakfast cereal is either sugary, granola, or muesli). Diner food. Hippie Hash from Fleetwood Diner. Pancakes as big as my plate from Sparty's. Cuban-inspired eggs in Miami Beach. Most days, I eat yogurt and bran flakes, but we've indulged at Sparty's, Soup Spoon, & Big Apple Bagels in Lansing and a variety of great spots in New York, Pennsylvania, Bedford, MA, Miami Beach, Orlando, and Louisville, KY.
Fabiano’s Homemade Chocolate. Malt balls, truffles, sour balls, chocolate-covered cherries and much more. Each bite perfect, staff always friendly.
Celebrating American holidays in America, and home cooking.
Halloween, seeing kids in costumes trick-or-treating, and carved Jack-o-lanterns. The quintessential American family holiday, Thanksgiving, where everyone has their favorite dishes. Grateful, indeed. Roasted vegetables. Pot roast that simmers for 8 hours. Turkey for Thanksgiving. We’ll have an oven in Europe, but mostly we didn’t have one in Asia. We missed it, especially for those hearty winter meals. And oh, yes, the occasional baking of chocolate chip and Italian lemon cookies. And those winter one-pot meals, like pea soup with Honeybaked ham.
The beauty of a snowy day, especially during the holidays. Yes, it is cold, but snow is undeniably beautiful. When the giant Christmas tree is lighted in front of the Michigan State Capitol, the holiday spirit is alive. When you’re retired and don’t have to commute to work, it is a lovely sight. (But maybe it doesn't have to last so long?)
Horrocks Farm Market. We’ve been to markets all over the world, and in many ways, Horrocks is as good as any of them. A vast array of fresh, local produce, freshly roasted coffee beans, spice mixes, home-made sausages that perk up any soup, a great beer and wine selection, inexpensive, beautiful flowers, and yes, candies that Paul loves. Horrocks is a treat.
Christmas and New Year’s with family. These holidays are special wherever we happen to be, but special in a different way when we are with family.
As I review this list, I can see why I have had such a difficult time keeping my weight under control all these years. Many of our favorite things are food-related, and often high-calorie food at that. But when we’re home for a relatively short time, we can indulge some in our favorites. And we’ve both learned some modicum of moderation.
I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that things in the U.S. right now are very troubling. We're concerned by the attacks on people who are exercising their free speech rights in Minnesota and elsewhere, and worried about U.S. threats of invasion of friendly territories. We are deeply worried about the future of democracy in America. We wish safety and security for everyone.
We’re in a bit of a holding pattern this winter, as we prepared for our Portugal residency visa interviews and subsequent, we hope, approval. We’ve secured a wonderful semi-detached house in central Lisbon with lots of space, a patio and balcony and fruit trees out front. We’ll be walking distance to cafes, bakeries, groceries, and Metro stops. Once the visas are in place, we will depart for our new rental home in Lisbon, hopefully getting our approval before our scheduled flights in early February. We’ll still travel, but not as much. We’ll still explore, but much of our exploration will be in Portugal and Europe. We’ll still come back to Michigan and spend time with our friends and family from time to time. We’re itching to start this new phase of our lives, but while we’re waiting, we’re planning to enjoy every part of this place that we can. So layer up for the winter, drink some hot cider, and hold tight to the ones you love. And, after this Spring, if you’re ever in Lisbon, look us up!